Monday, April 13, 2015

Life Gets in the Way



Let's face it, life just gets in the way. It stands in the way of what we want to do, rather than what we HAVE to do. As I have mentioned in my last post, I am dealing with an injury. Since the injury, Dd has been avoided so as not to over tax my body anymore then necessary. Throw in a little family drama into the mix and you have a perfect snapshot of my week. I did go and see an orthopedist and get an MRI of my knee. I know that there are two possible outcomes of the test results: Either I will be stuck in a brace for several weeks and begin physical therapy for my knee and my back (unrelated problem), or I will need surgery...Oh, yay for me.

After a one week break from ttwd, I am assured I cannot hold on to my sanity without ttwd. So, I have had to have a talk with Jim and convince him to begin Dd again and help me find a release from the stress. He was being kind and allowing my body to heal and agreed we both need this. So through some modifications we are back on track. Last night was when we broke the dry spell and brought the flogger out.



I am one that will fill myself with anxiety and over-think everything unless I find a release. For me, that is why ttwd works for me. I get a break from myself and the racing thoughts that lead me to days full of anxiety and worry.

So here we are, me laying flat on my stomach burying my face in the pillow and relishing every single blow. The flogger begins to slice through the air and smacks my bottom and my thighs. Jim has been out of sorts without ttwd as well, my moods have been difficult for both of us, (as I have stated before I am a handful). At this point, we are at around 18 blows, (rough guess as I do not count the strikes), his rhythm is perfect and each blow is coming harder than the last one. Ah the relief! Each strike begins releasing tension, worry, and guilt for waiting to set things right. Then...POW! Jim forgets my left knee is still injured.



The leather tails of the flogger smack the back of my knee with vengeance and stored up justice (no, he did not do it on purpose). We both freeze. "Oh shit!" followed by tons of apologies filling my ears. I begin laughing after the shock of the pain and tell him to carry on (not on my knee though).

If, anyone is reading this and considering Dd, please know that these things happen. Ttwd is not perfect and accidents do happen regardless of experience and years of practicing this lifestyle. As for me, I am still glad we decided to stop the break from ttwd and my knee is no worse for wear than it was before.





8 comments:

  1. Oh bless, glad you broke the drought, hope your knee is better soon
    love Jan,xx

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    Replies
    1. Hi Jan,

      I truly hate the droughts. I start doubting myself and question everything. So glad it is over now.

      Hugs,
      Kathy

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  2. Hi Kathy, I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. Sending positive thoughts and healing energy your way for a speedy recovery.

    I'm glad you broke the drought too and found some release from the stress and anxiety. Accidents and mistakes happen. Have you talked about ways to retain Dd without spanking while you are healing?

    Hugs
    Roz

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    Replies
    1. Hi Roz,

      Yes, we have a few non spanking punishments. The list needs expanded though. Any ideas you have are more than welcome and if you prefer, you can email them to me.

      Hugs,
      Kathy

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  3. Kathy,
    I hope you recover quickly. I'm glad you are back on track with ttwd. We took a three week break when we were sick and our relationship and my emotions suffered the same as yours did. It's amazing how quickly ttwd changes marriages and once you experience it, you don't want to give it up!
    Megan

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    Replies
    1. Megan,

      Ttwd sure helps when my emotions are in control of my actions. Without ttwd, I would be a mess.

      Hugs,
      Kathy

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  4. Argh, this reminded me of last summer. I had hurt my back really badly and couldn't move for weeks, crawling around on the floor. Horrible.
    I hope your knee and back feel better, try not to overdo it, rest, but don't rest too much.
    And its hard when you are in that much pain, and you are needy but unable to take anything.

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    Replies
    1. Julia,

      I am healing slowly but doing much better. The brace and the crutches are no longer needed. Thanks for your kind words.

      Hugs,
      Kathy

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